Princeton FML

Search Results for: toilet paper

• The hobos in NY Penn Station get to wipe their asses with two-ply toilet paper while we wipe ours with one-ply. FOL and FPtonForBeingSoDamnCheap!

  February 20, 2010 | 4 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +30 / -18

   

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• The toilet paper here makes your butt drier, but not cleaner. FOHygiene

  February 18, 2010 | 0 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +23 / -11

   

• I’m sick. I shat myself while passing gas at breakfast, 15 minutes before class. I had to go through 3 hours of class commando. My ass was also horribly chafed by the large amount of one-ply toilet paper I needed to clean myself. FML

  February 3, 2010 | 5 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +37 / -37

   

• Even the Wawa has better toilet paper than the 1-ply in the dorms. FML

  December 21, 2009 | 6 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +43 / -5

   

• Princeton toilet paper is so thin it’s see-though. FOL

  December 20, 2009 | 1 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +28 / -20

   

• Bathroom is out of toilet paper. I’m on my period. FML

  December 18, 2009 | 2 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +47 / -7

   

• After waiting nearly 3 hours to use the bathroom, my ass has opened up and released a torrential fiery shower of glory. Unfortunately, my suite is out of toilet paper. FML

  December 18, 2009 | 0 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +20 / -12

   

• I’m currently sitting on a toilet in a bathroom with two stalls and no toilet paper or paper towels. The only other mens bathroom in this building is closed. FML

  December 17, 2009 | 0 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +24 / -3

   

• I took a dump without noticing that my stall was out of toilet paper. As I shuffled awkwardly to the next stall with my pants down, another dude walked in. FML

  December 10, 2009 | 0 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +72 / -1

   

• I thought the USG was supposed to be worried about student life; why is there a question about bananas in the election? At least toilet paper is relevant. FOL

  December 9, 2009 | 4 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +14 / -15

   

• I believed the phenomenon of my ass hurting whenever I’m on campus was a physical manifestation of how much Princeton rapes me. It turns out it’s actually because of the crappy toilet paper. I can’t decide which of the two is less bad. FML

  December 8, 2009 | 5 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +38 / -12

   

• The most important issue in the USG presidential campaign, as well as on Princeton FML, is toilet paper. FML

  December 4, 2009 | 1 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +45 / -1

   

• Today, I realized that I wipe too hard even though the one-ply toilet paper is really rough. Thus, my butthole is always bleeding. FTP, and FML

  December 4, 2009 | 1 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +9 / -26

   

• Today, I realized that I don’t wipe enough because the one-ply toilet paper is so rough and uncomfortable. Thus, my butt is always itchy. FTP, and FML

  December 3, 2009 | 2 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +8 / -36

   

• Today, I was unable to find the correct angle to pull the toilet paper and kept tearing off short fragments. Then, I lost the loose end that you pull on and had to spin the wheel around for several minutes trying to relocate it. Not even pooping is easy here. FML

  December 3, 2009 | 4 Comments | Post Comment

  Score: +55 / -1