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  • Just do it. Repeal damn grade deflation and chill profs. FOLOH

    +1/-3   

    9:47 am on September 26, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • F'18 9:54 am on September 26, 2014 | Reply

      ?

    • BS 9:30 pm on September 26, 2014 | Reply

      Seriously profs, chill. We r getting so screwed vs my ex HS classmates at harvard and yale.

      • Luis Suarez 10:03 am on September 27, 2014 | Reply

        That’s why I bite people!

        • nobody 10:31 pm on September 27, 2014 | Reply

          cares about your favorite sport. stop being a bro.

    • meth major 10:38 pm on September 26, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo just offer meth to all your professors and you’ll get straight As

      • buttfucker 420 9:29 pm on September 27, 2014 | Reply

        yoyo you’re doing it wrong.

    • Julia Child 10:11 pm on September 27, 2014 | Reply

      Chill profs, then serve on a bed of rice. Garnish with lemon to taste.

    • '13 1:23 pm on September 30, 2014 | Reply

      It not that simple. As the initial report earlier this year indicated, average GPA dropped pretty steeply in the few years before the grade deflation policy was adopted. Since the policy was adopted GPA’s have stayed nearly the same (they’ve actually gone up a bit but not significantly). The formal policy seems to have little association with actual effects on grades. Grades likely have a lot more to do with the institutional attitudes than the policy itself. I think the university would be better served if we stop having these narrow minded “get rid of the grade deflation policy” discussions, and actually engaged in a discussion of what we think fair grading standards and ideals look like. Right now it the majority of the discussion from the student side sounds like a simple demand for more A’s and I think professors are fair in not wanting to give in to that.

    • Your Prof 8:27 pm on September 30, 2014 | Reply

      No.

  • Lakeside apartments delayed from August to December/January at best… tons of grad students “temporarily” moved to falling-apart Butler and Stanworth. FOGradLs

    +9/-0   

    9:45 am on September 26, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • meth major 10:40 am on September 26, 2014 | Reply

      that’s why I decided selling meth is a better idea than majoring in math.

      • - 2:28 pm on September 26, 2014 | Reply

        ++++ love this

      • GS 9:19 pm on September 26, 2014 | Reply

        It’s funny because I’m pretty sure the OP is in applied math.

    • Luis Suarez 11:39 pm on September 26, 2014 | Reply

      That’s why I bite people!

  • Tiger Admirers is back FOLs

    +3/-1   

    7:03 am on September 25, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Woody Woobie 8:03 am on September 25, 2014 | Reply

      My major still isn’t selective. FML

      • Luis Suarez 12:10 am on September 26, 2014 | Reply

        That’s why I bite people!

    • meth major 10:14 am on September 25, 2014 | Reply

      Yoyo

      • Geez 12:40 am on September 26, 2014 | Reply

        Next thing we know this character will be sucking off dicks for some rocks.

  • Tiger Admirers is back MLIG

    +6/-1   

    12:38 pm on September 24, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • The 'Prince'! 4:44 pm on September 24, 2014 | Reply

      Tiger Admirers is reportedly back after being threatened with a lawsuit by three students from the class of 2013.

    • buttfucker 420 4:46 pm on September 24, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo fuk buts smoke weed admire los tigres rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr 420 yolo

    • ptonhater 666 7:58 pm on September 24, 2014 | Reply

      yes and I just puked at the sight of it.

    • Luis Suarez 12:27 am on September 25, 2014 | Reply

      That’s why I bite people!

    • L'Sleutteax 1:35 pm on September 25, 2014 | Reply

      Now everyone too timid will hide behind anonymity, getting them nowhere, and leaving all the boys for me! Whoopee!

    • Kimba the White Lion 6:19 pm on September 25, 2014 | Reply

      I got a couple of those. Wish they would just come up and say hi to me instead :(

      • '17 12:00 pm on September 26, 2014 | Reply

        kimba, you are actually the cutest! so sad you’re gone now :’(

  • Just realized that I probably got rejected to my internship applications last year because my transcript was pixelated. FML

    +1/-6   

    7:02 am on September 23, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Old NassHole 10:18 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

      no it’s because they can sense your stupidity just from your name. Try fucking some real Old Money to get gonections old sport, unless you’re also too ugly to.

      • Owl Eyes 6:44 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

        +1000 for “gonections”

        • Woody Woobie 9:29 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

          +1 if my major becomes selective again.

          • Old NassHole 12:34 pm on September 24, 2014 | Reply

            yoyo just smoke weed and fuck the deans up their butts to convince them to banish all the below-average fucktards from your major and my fucking alma mater

      • Nostalgic 11:39 am on September 26, 2014 | Reply

        I miss Old Money…

    • Luis Suarez 8:56 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

      That’s why I bite people!

    • meth major 11:04 pm on September 24, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo my transcript is better seen pixelated cuz its so scary I’d rather sell meth than explain it to interviewers

  • I’m so sick of all the shallow, social climbing tools at this school. The social environment cannot possible be this toxic at every other top school. FOLs.

    +23/-4   

    5:01 pm on September 22, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Pi Phi 5:39 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      OHHHH MYYYY GODDDD YOUR SOOOO RIGHTT IFFF YUOOU WANTT TOO BE ATTT THEHE TOOPPP DONUT CLLIMMBB JSUT GETT BOORN TOO AAA DDADY ATT GOLDMAN SACKS ANDD YOUR ALREADDY ATT THEE TOOPPP MUAH YOUR A DOL

    • ptonhater 666 6:02 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo just fuck them up there assholes because that’s all they are

    • Welcome 6:24 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      to the real world.

    • '16 7:10 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      Yeah, fuck them

    • Luis Suarez 7:31 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      That’s why I bite people!

    • actually 7:54 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      “normal” people can be as unpleasant, assholes, and definitely less refined/gentle than rich people. don’t forget that.

      • so... yeah 1:57 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

        you’re toxic. and not the way britney meant it.

    • spoiler 11:36 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      it is as toxic everywhere else

    • buttfucker 420 12:02 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

      I dunno, what I’ve heard from people at “other top schools” suggests more of the same.

    • fed up 10:15 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

      can someone explain to me why social-climbing automatically makes one shallow? and for that matter partying/getting wasted. Isn’t it pretentious to scorn the popular forms of socialization just for the sake of not being shallow? FYL.

      • 15 4:46 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

        i don’t think partying or getting wasted makes you shallow and it’s a bit immature when someone thinks they are so mature and superior because they refrain from such things… especially if they actually avoid them because of secret fear/insecurity, as often (certainly not always) happens.

        i do think social climbing is by definition a “shallow” pursuit because in order to be successful at it you have to focus on and value rather superficial things about other people, and develop those superficially valuable parts of yourself. it’s probably possible to do this while having very serious overarching goals and containing multitudes yourself. but i think focusing on such things would drive most people towards a tendency to be “shallow”.

        • Lord Roissy 6:38 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

          Oh yeah, only the sophisticated and classy people party constantly and get shit-faced repeatedly at frat gatherings, slobbering sexual fluids all over each other while they hook-up in their excessively inebriated state. I’ve known a few of my fellow aristocrats to get wasted most weekends too.

          In any case, I bet this venerable person either is a self-conscious slut that blacks out with a different cock in her mouth every Thursday and is trying to rationalize away such behavior (“I can still be a classy whore, tyvm!”), or has down’s syndrome. Any takers?

          • F'18 1:43 am on September 24, 2014 | Reply

            ?

          • Old NassHole 12:32 pm on September 24, 2014 | Reply

            atta boy.

          • 15 1:11 pm on September 25, 2014 | Reply

            i didn’t even mention hooking up you weirdo. let alone shit-faced slobbering

    • seriously 11:37 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

      At which “top schools” do you think the social environment is less toxic? Harvard’s finals clubs? Yale’s secret societies?

      • Columbia or UChicago 3:21 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

        How toxic can the environment be when you have NYC or Chicago to go out into?

        • Lord Roissy 6:19 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

          That would make the respective environments even more toxic, not less. Any idea how large the non-white ghetto populations are in those cities? Not exactly clean, pleasant, or safe places to be to hang out with the poor, dangerous, and/or stupid.

          And, yes, Princeton has a toxic social environment worse than most. That is incontrovertible. If not worse than the other top ivy schools – arguable, I suppose – then certainly worse than most middle-tier schools.

          • '10 1:52 am on September 24, 2014 | Reply

            I’m wondering – what if this isn’t your standard troll, but your standard pompous ’18 who hasn’t yet had his ego violently crushed and has stumbled into Anscombe?

        • learn to read 7:05 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

          OP said “top schools,” not “schools for second-rate guttersnipes.”

    • Anonymous 9:28 pm on September 25, 2014 | Reply

      But seriously though, how is the social life at Columbia/UChicago equally toxic? You can just go into the city and avoid all the fratstars.

  • Fucked a junior in Ivy and got crabs. FTheirOldMoneyLs

    +9/-1   

    9:13 am on September 21, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttfucker 420 10:32 am on September 21, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo you should have just fucked her up da butt and then you wouldn’t have crabs and would be able to smoke weed in peace

    • ptonhater 666 12:40 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo its Princeton what do you expect just smoke weed and fuck butts it will make your life better in this putrid shithole

      • Why 2:06 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

        do you hate Princeton?

    • of 3:24 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

      course what were you expecting?

    • Jameis Winston 12:39 am on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      yo I got my crabs for free

    • Lord Roissy 1:19 am on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      Ivy used to be old money; not anymore. They have lots of non-whites, and – along with Princeton itself – have lost a lot of the old Gatsby-esque stereotypical gentlemanly prestige (namely, rich white upper-class male) ever since the school unfortunately become co-ed in the 60′s or so.

      Thus, in relation to the OP – I am not surprised. Fuck an ivy 50 years ago, get access to something like some exclusive Congressional chamber. Fuck an ivy now, get crabs from some Korean social climbing tool.

      Also, you’re a dumb whore. If you want to spread your legs to showcase your fetid overused pussy for the cock du jeur (pardon my French), you can do better than that easily.

      • L'Sleutteax 1:03 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

        You’ll have to excuse Lord Roissy. Sometimes getting drunk on your own money and ego renders you unable to keep it up in the bedroom. I know for a fact this is true for him.

        It can make you terrible at spelling as well. “Du jeur” – pouah!

        • Lord Roissy 11:26 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

          Alcohol was only the charitable excuse I gave you so you wouldn’t feel as bad about the fact that your hideous face made my cock shrivel up in disgust so badly that no amount of blue pills could ever remedy.

          And yes, I made the grave error of misspelling a French word. If you knew how to read English, however, you’d see I alluded to my lack of proficiency in French in the parenthesis next to it.

          • L'Sleutteax 3:38 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

            Oh, sweetie, it’s great to see you’re still you since we parted ways! Losing an argument? Pull the old reading comprehension trick. Truth about your sexuality too painful? Hate your partner and his/her gender instead. So cute!

            • Lord Roissy 6:07 pm on September 23, 2014

              I didn’t lose any argument since you’re just a crackpot who – instead of arguing coherently – chooses rather to make up bullshit and insult me. You need to first construct an argument if you want to accuse me of losing it.

              And I didn’t so much pull the ‘old reading comprehension’ trick as much as point it out after you first demonstrated your inability to read properly. Again, just a tip: you’re not going to anger me by telling me I spell poorly in a language I already admitted to not knowing well.

              I do find your interest in me and your constant fixation in talking about my bedroom prowess to be very endearing and rather amusing, but, alas, I am not interested in whores. Sorry.

              Here is how you responded to a person lamenting the end of summer:

              “Just find someone to make love to! I find it invigorating. He might end up fatigued in another way though ;)”

              Gee, L’Sluteax, is there any problem not fixable by spreading your legs? What an interesting and clever person you must be to make such a witty and insightful comment.

              And, I don’t hate all women, sweetheart. Just the ones like you.

      • Old NassHole 7:57 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

        +1

      • Anonymous 12:17 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

        I have to say, it’s nice to have a troll who does not debase him or herself with comments that are at once vapid and vile to the point of making the site unenjoyable. I have to admit that I’m somewhat surprised, however, by some of the more vituperative responses to Lord Roissy’s remarks – if you think you’re right then there’s no need to defend yourself so aggressively. It’s the anonymous internet, how much constructive discussion do you expect to have with a troll?

        • '15 3:43 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

          The vituperation is probably a result of his borderline-misogynistic comments about women and sex. In case you haven’t been paying attention to the blogosphere, it’s become a bit of a hot topic lately. It takes less work to boil people’s blood if it’s been boiling recently already.

          • Lord Roissy 5:51 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

            “I am just so angry when people call me out as being an unattractive whore that is completely undesirable for anything longer than a weekend tryst. I just want to live in a world where actions don’t have consequences and people don’t judge others based on the choices that they make! Let me spread my putrid disease-ridden pussy and ride my cock carousel in peace!”

            You’re fighting the good fight at a place like Princeton. You are the next Michelle Obama. Preach on sister!

            • you are 8:26 pm on September 23, 2014

              a horrendous giant cockbag. Like probably *literally* a bag of dicks with a nervous system.

            • Lord Roissy 11:24 pm on September 23, 2014

              “Literally.”

              Also, if dicks weren’t already connected to the nervous system, men would be unable to use them. Hope you fuck better than you learn.

            • '15 1:40 am on September 24, 2014

              First, “sister”? Nope, wrong parts, mate. Sorry to disappoint.

              Second, where exactly am I doing anything more in my post than neutrally making a guess at others’ motivations? Using the norms set by said blogosphere and the culture of the greater internet as a frame of reference, your comments are indeed borderline misogynistic. Just observing, that’s all.

              For someone who seems to like to call out others’ failure at reading comprehension you should probably try harder not to lapse yourself.

      • yo Dilettante 10:12 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

        i c u

        • Lord Roissy 5:35 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

          I am not he; though, apparently – given his reputation of posts, what I am led to believe – that are complex, cerebral, analytical, and thoughtful responses that have an ‘old school’ air about them along with a flair for the dramatic and grandiose, I should look into this matter further.

          He seems like a cool enough guy. Dilettante – if you read this, dear brother – you are cordially invited for drinks with me, in around 1.5 – 2 weeks time, at the Beverly Hills Four Seasons where I will be. I will be the one wearing dark designer sunglasses and signing autographs at the corner booth adjacent to their Italian restaurant and dazzling the women there with my classic good looks.

          We can discuss how my contempt of unattractive and promiscuous women makes me a misogynist in the eyes of these undesirable malcontents, and what vile man I must be to have the audacity to tell women to respect themselves and their bodies by eschewing hooking-up for loving monogamy.

          Also, if I truly were he – I’d write under the Dilettante moniker. I’m proud of my posts.

        • NOPE 8:32 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

          The Dilettante is actually not a misogynistic shitbag. This Lord Roissy fuckboy is more or less the epitome of everything the Dilettante hates and longs to pulverize.

          Even if Lord Shitbag McGee there wants to have drinks with the Dilettante, I’d be pretty surprised if he accepted or at least didn’t use the opportunity to beat Lord Shitbag McGee into a blood bubble-burping pulp.

          • Lord Roissy 11:32 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

            Shitbag McGee? Clever and witty.

            “Disagree with someone? Throw a punch!”
            Is this Princeton FML or Compton FML? I suppose the admissions office admits voracious harpies to pass as Princetonians these days; how nice. This institution is rapidly losing its old-world gentlemanly charm.

            Also, my beloved and disenfranchised harlot – I don’t hate all women like a real misogynist would; just the ones like you.

          • dude 12:38 am on September 24, 2014 | Reply

            uh, the Dilettante isn’t going to be beating anyone senseless anytime soon.

            • '18 9:09 pm on September 24, 2014

              Only in his sick sexual fantasies that we all know he has.

      • Please 11:54 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

        Gatsby lacked college education, and the company he kept (Carraway and Buchanan) were Yalies. I believe the prestigious gentlemen you’re looking for are the Kerry Holidays, the Thomas Park D’Invilliers, the Dick Humbirds.

    • Pi Phi 4:11 am on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      OHHHH MYYYY GODDDDDD IM SOOO SORRRYYY I GOTTT THEMMM FRROM SUM LOSER WHOO WASS SOMKING WEED ANND FCUKED MYY BUT SOOO BLAME HIMM MUAH YOUR A DOL

      • buttfucker 420 10:35 am on September 25, 2014 | Reply

        yoyo you’re welcome to more weed and buttfucking muah your a sol

    • Luis Suarez 8:59 am on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      That’s why I bite people!

    • The 'Prince'! 1:19 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

      The crabs declined to comment.

      • This is a reference to 4:13 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

        LeBron James.

    • meth major 12:32 am on September 25, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo just tell them you’re a Romanian math major with IQ of 200 then they’d be impressed

  • Textbook doesn’t have answers in the back. FML

    +3/-5   

    9:13 am on September 21, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Hahaha 9:55 am on September 21, 2014 | Reply

      #engineeringproblems

    • ptonhater 666 3:16 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo just transfer to MIT or Stanford if you can afford it they have much better buttfucking parties and weed

    • Old NassHole 12:30 pm on September 24, 2014 | Reply

      A true Princetonian should be motivated to learn for love of learning. Instead of complaining on PFML, you should be stalking all your preceptors for extra challenge problems and majoring in COS, math, physics, premed, and prelaw simultaneously while getting shitfaced every night like the good old boys. If you can’t do that, you’re a pathetic retarded AA admit and should gtfo before I evict you from the libraries and dorm buildings I donated.

      • Young NassHole 11:20 pm on September 25, 2014 | Reply

        Bravo, well said!

  • Does genuine ”dating” exist on this campus? Gentlemen? Like monogamous bf/gf connections not DFMOs? Apprehensive frosh. FMLL

    +5/-7   

    9:13 am on September 21, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • monogamous '17 12:19 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

      yes it does! There are actually a lot of committed relationships happening on campus. If you know what you want, and project it, good things will happen.

    • ptonhater 666 12:42 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo all the assholes here are too proud to date anyone other than themselves and their PENIS

    • anon '16 4:30 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

      Like others said, there are lots of people in longer-term (i.e. longer than a couple weekends) relationships here. If that’s what you want, go for it. Just be very clear with whoever you’re pursuing that that’s what you want.

    • Uh 12:02 am on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      Maybe you would better luck in that regard if you learned how to communicate in complete sentences.

      • dUh 12:35 am on September 22, 2014 | Reply

        And maybe you should proofread lol.

      • but 12:40 am on September 22, 2014 | Reply

        fragments good. sentences hard.

    • Lord Roissy 1:33 am on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      My advice pertains to and assumes a male OP:

      Firstly, the vast multitude of Princeton women are undesirable for anything significant; a small population exists for hookups, and an even smaller population exists for something longer-term. The vast majority of the women there are as promiscuous as they are vapid and ugly. I don’t play the lottery, and neither should you.

      In addition – as a Princeton male, you will appear to them as special and exciting as their routine Valtrex doses. Don’t bother with them, be it praising or chiding.

      The best advice I can give you is to find someone outside the gigantic orange bubble that seems to fuel their, even bigger, egos – ones who’d rather be monolithic feminist powerhouse tankgrrrls that show everyone how “liberated and enlightened” they are by sucking the cocks of half the football team weekly at the clubs, rather than being normal, comely, doting, and loving monogamous partners.

      Use your status to get desirable women outside of Princeton instead of the opposite – cohabitating with undesirable “Princeton women” that overvalue their status while simultaneously devaluing yours.
      Best wishes and good luck.

      • OP 1:05 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

        I’m a woman. And you’re a jackass.

        • real OP 11:20 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

          uh, I wrote the above, and I’m a man who’s constantly surrounded by shallow women. It seems you’re just a bitter feminist at the truth and the real jackass here.

          • BS 9:44 pm on September 24, 2014 | Reply

            U know ur not the real OP. Get a life. Some balls too ” little” man.

      • '17 6:46 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

        I’m a woman who’s currently in a very long-term relationship. Fuck you.

        Anyway, date engineer ladies–we’re clever, humble, and immensely dedicated by definition.

        • ... 8:32 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

          and unattractive…

          • '17 9:23 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

            Meh. In a couple decades we’ll all be unattractive anyway.

            • Lord Roissy 7:08 pm on September 23, 2014

              Oh, so that totally excuses you for being unattractive now. After some decades, we’ll all be dead too – should we, then, by your logic, not live right now, either?

              I thought engineers were supposed to at least be smart to make up for their ugliness. Oh well. Your closet-case boyfriend must be a lucky guy.

              And – lol. a teenager who considers herself to be so sophisticated because she’s in a “very long-term relationship” at her wizened old age. I am sure that you, at age 18 or so, have reached the pinnacle of sexual, emotional, and relationship depth, profundity, and maturity because you opened your vaj to him since age 13.

          • The definition of an engineer 12:41 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

            engineer: noun, a person who designs, builds, or maintains engines, machines, or public works. Where does it say clever, humble, and immensely dedicated?

        • Lord Roissy 11:44 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

          I agree – ‘Fuck you’ is the epitome of cleverness, humbleness, and dedication to logical counter-arguments. You also forgot sweet, endearing, feminine, and loving.

          In any case, I thank you, harpy, for your response. I couldn’t have asked for a better validation. And you forgot one important trait about engineering ladies: ugly. You can build bridges, but not a face that isn’t putrid.

        • But 1:29 am on September 23, 2014 | Reply

          If you call yourself humble, are you really humble after all? …

      • Pat Feenus 11:52 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

        This is the best and most truthful thing I have ever read on PFML. Bravo, sir!

    • '16 11:38 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      I always love a good troll, as well as those who fall for one

    • '15 8:34 pm on September 23, 2014 | Reply

      Been dating the love of my life for a year. Absolutely.

      • 14 3:00 am on September 24, 2014 | Reply

        That’s too bad. I’m sorry to hear that, and I hope things get better soon!

  • Part of me is too scared to test the waters with this gorgeous ’16 I’ve seen everywhere lately, but then I’m like fuck it I’m a senior now bro. MSLIG

    +8/-1   

    9:10 am on September 19, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • 15 chick 9:33 am on September 19, 2014 | Reply

      do it! hooking up with seniors was always more fun.. sucks for me

    • buttfucker 420 10:14 am on September 19, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo just smoke weed and then fuk em up da but

    • buttfucker 420 11:13 am on September 20, 2014 | Reply

      that’s too yoyo. I hope YOUR PENIS is very weed. Keep fuking butss.

      • OP 12:32 pm on September 20, 2014 | Reply

        For your information, this is entirely my fault. I suggested BF420 could be defeated the same way CLJ was and that just gave him ideas. I should have known better. I’m an asshole. :(

        • No 10:48 pm on September 20, 2014 | Reply

          Buttfucker 420 cannot be defeated.

          Buttfucker 420 is love. Buttfucker 420 is life.

          • Yo 4:03 am on September 21, 2014 | Reply

            stfu

            • buttswaguette 777 11:02 am on September 21, 2014

              yoyo no u

            • Yoyo 3:37 pm on September 21, 2014

              I was only 19 years old
              I loved buttfucker 420 so much, I had read all his posts on PFML
              I pray to buttfucker 420 every night before bed, thanking him for the life I’ve been given
              “Buttfucker 420 is love” I say. “Buttfucker 420 is life”
              My roommate hears me and calls me ******
              I knew he was jealous of my devotion to buttfucker 420
              I called him a ****
              He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep
              Im crying, and my face hurts
              I lay in bed and its really cold
              A warmth is moving towards me
              I feel something touch me
              Its buttfucker 420
              I am so happy
              He whispers in to ear “this is my school”
              He grabs me with his powerful buttfucking hands and puts me on my hands and knees
              I’m ready
              I spread my ass cheeks for Buttfucker 420
              He penetrates my butthole
              It hurts so much but I do it for buttfucker 420
              I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water
              I push against his force
              I want to please Buttfucker 420
              He roars a mighty YOYO as he fills my butt with his love
              My roommate walks in
              Buttfucker 420 looks him straight in the eye and says. “Yoyo just smoke weed and fuck them up the butts”
              Buttfucker 420 leaves through my window
              Buttfucker 420 is love, Buttfucker 420 is life

          • buttfucker 420 9:43 am on September 26, 2014 | Reply

            yoyo it’s buttfucker not Buttfucker

        • ptonhater 666 12:43 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

          yoyo even after smoking weed and fuking buttsss Princeton people have no sense of humor

    • Lord Roissy 5:05 am on September 21, 2014 | Reply

      Nothing to fear – she is, most likely – a pretty face with an empty heart and an even emptier soul. You will meet many gorgeous women in your life; they are a dime a dozen.

      The key thing to remember is to fear and avoid losing face with a soulmate with whom you connect with on an emotional level; if some vapid bimbo rejects you, it is no skin off your nose. best of luck.

      oh, and 15 chick – you sound like a classy gal with an even classier moniker. keep riding that cock carousel – it will only increase your long-term value toward men.

      • another 15 chick 2:43 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

        Excuse me, number of partners she or I sleep with does not do anything to my/her “value”. While your comment impressed me with its literary value and thought-of opinions, it pains me that such intellect was reduced to shaming a woman for expressing her sexuality.

        • Lord Roissy 7:38 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

          such is the beauty of axiomatic truth my dear – it remains true irrespective of your feminist shrieking to the contrary that falls on the deaf ears of our biomechanical overlords. namely that: chastity is a virtue and promiscuity is a vice. whores do not find love, and do not make good long-term partners.

          • uhh 8:28 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

            i think you’re giving him too much credit for intellect. biomechanical overlords = “chastity is a virtue”? sounds logical

            • Lord Roissy 12:54 am on September 22, 2014

              Biological imperatives that humans have obtained through natural selection (as elucidated through evolutionary biology and psychology) don’t care about what you think is logical or not. Women that have accrued numerous partners posed a fidelity risk to their mates.

              Try again feebly to justify your whoring behavior more please. Cry me a river about the harsh reality of the world – then go drown yourself in it, slut.

      • 15 chick 4:45 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

        lucky for me i don’t feel any longing to be valued by the male equivalent of the vapid bimbos you allude to.

        • 15 chick 7:58 pm on September 21, 2014 | Reply

          on second thought i actually semi-regret that retort – although i find this pfml character very irritating, i don’t think of even casual sexual partners (or anyone i know) as “dime a dozen”, “empty souls” or “bimbos”

          • Lord Roissy 1:09 am on September 22, 2014 | Reply

            on third thought, methinks this street-walker doth protest too much.

            in any case, I allude to no such male bimbos (but that would require reading comprehension skills of a rudimentary quality to understand). I would ask that you learn to sharpen your tongue, but such a slut would only believe that I meant for you to improve your bj technique.

            you demonstrate the last refuge of a diseased mind and desperate soul – the illusory thought that you choose out of your own free volition your unattractive state as a malcontented whore, and lack of a desire to be viewed favorably by others; instead of understanding that, rather, you were forcibly relegated to it by either poor circumstance, poor choices, or both.

            instead of crying foul, may I suggest to go hook up with more seniors at ivy or cottage, as you wrote before. sell your body for cheap thrills and embolden that ‘A’ on your forehead for clearer identification. just make sure you have a cute ass, you don’t make eye-contact, you leave promptly in the morning with no small-talk, and that you use your fetid lips (both of them) for something other than menstruating words that are devoid of meaning.

            • durrr 7:02 pm on September 22, 2014

              She was the one who introduced the “male equivalent” while making it clear that you alluded to vapid bimbos, which in fact you did. You’re letting your pretentious diction get away from you i’m afraid.

            • Lord Roissy 12:08 am on September 23, 2014

              @durrr (fitting name): I didn’t allude to ‘vapid bimbos’ – I, outright, spoke about this openly, clearly, and directly. Thus, she must’ve meant that I alluded to ‘male equivalents’, but as you admit, she introduced that idea; so, by definition, I couldn’t have alluded to that term either. In other words, you are wrong based on any possible interpretation.

              My advice: act less like a blinded struck piglet because you are bitter that you are a carousel-riding harpy, and learn what words like ‘allude’ mean more. Whores never learn – about neither academic affairs nor their own.

  • Growing fond of the fuckbuddy. Well, time to call it quits then. FML

    +4/-3   

    9:08 am on September 19, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttfucker 420 10:14 am on September 19, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo growing fond of u 2 buddy smkoin weedin fukin ur but ;)))))))0

    • buttfucker 420 11:25 pm on September 19, 2014 | Reply

      That’s too bad. I hope your partner wants to POUND THAT BOY/GIRL/ALTERNATIVEGENDERPUSSY and stay safe. Also have you tried fucking up the butt?

    • OR 5:12 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      Grow a pair, man up, mature and deal with/get in touch with your emotions. Love is not bad! Your lucky you found someone you like and are clearly physically attracted. To

    • Or 5:14 pm on September 22, 2014 | Reply

      You could grow up and maturely figure out if you’ ve been lucky to find love and attraction.

  • Didn’t get invited back to any sorority after the second round. FML

    +1/-4   

    9:04 am on September 19, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttphucker 420 10:22 am on September 19, 2014 | Reply

      that’s too bad. I hope you’re partner is a dol. Stay cexiiii.

    • Wait 11:21 am on September 19, 2014 | Reply

      Why do you even care? What is the point of sororities even? There are only three sororities but eleven eating clubs.

    • Theta 11:27 pm on September 19, 2014 | Reply

      Try being prettier next time.

    • Junior 1:17 am on September 20, 2014 | Reply

      Probs won’t get into a selective club then sorry

    • Pi Phi 11:07 am on September 20, 2014 | Reply

      OHHHHHH MYYYYYY GODDDDDD UJSTTTTT LET BUTTTUFKCER 420 UFCK YOU UP DA BUTTT AND YOU CAN HANG OUT IWHT ALL THE HAWTT COOOL PPL IN IVVVYYY AND SMOKEKEE 420WEEED BUT IF YOU DONT THEN YOUR AN UGLY UNCEXIII LOSERRRR MUAH YOUR NOT A DOL

  • Frosh boys seem too scared to try dating. FOGL

    +2/-3   

    4:42 pm on September 18, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttfucker 420 5:54 pm on September 18, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo just smoke weed and fuck people up their butts 24/7 you’d have more dates than pubic hair problem solved bro

      • L'Sleutteax 7:02 pm on September 18, 2014 | Reply

        Oh Andrew, I love you and everything, but you’re terrible in bed while high. Which is a shame, because it’s great to go dans le cul with you otherwise.

    • Woody Woobie 10:50 pm on September 18, 2014 | Reply

      Frosh boys aren’t too scared to major in Woody Woo. FMyNonSelectiveMajorL

    • Just do it 12:40 am on September 19, 2014 | Reply

      Ask a frosh girl to coffee. Have balls. 2018 power!

      • n 1:00 am on September 22, 2014 | Reply

        o

  • I love you and I’m 99.9% sure you don’t love me back since you told me you hated me yesterday. FML.

    +8/-0   

    11:23 pm on September 17, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttfucker 420 12:33 am on September 18, 2014 | Reply

      Give it time. Things magically get better over time. Not that I would know anything about it but.

      • wtf 3:19 pm on September 18, 2014 | Reply

        is buttfucker 420 an advice guy now?

        • buttswaglet 913 10:48 pm on September 18, 2014 | Reply

          yoyo nono.

      • Anonymous 9:44 pm on September 19, 2014 | Reply

        lol

    • solidarity 1:47 am on September 18, 2014 | Reply

      for that 0.1%.

    • Fun Fact 2:05 am on September 18, 2014 | Reply

      Varys smuggled Rhaegar’s son to Essos. Gregor Clegane unknowingly killed a different infant.

      • Funner Fact 1:17 am on September 19, 2014 | Reply

        Sandor Clegane isn’t dead.

        • Funnest Fact 8:49 am on September 19, 2014 | Reply

          R + L = J

    • Stastician 2:09 am on September 18, 2014 | Reply

      How did you get such a precise estimate?

    • i'm pretty sure i know who you are 4:16 pm on September 18, 2014 | Reply

      and i’d recommend updating to 100%

  • Bonnie Bassler, MFILF. OLAG.

    +1/-1   

    8:42 pm on September 17, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • David Foster Wallace 10:35 pm on September 17, 2014 | Reply

      That’s what your partner said. Shell get over it.

    • '15 Fucker of Fantastically Fat Sue 1:53 am on September 18, 2014 | Reply

      Just remember to use protection – you don’t want to explore THAT type of molecular biology!

    • MPC '15? 6:59 pm on September 18, 2014 | Reply

      ?

  • There is a special place in hell for people who respond to email lists with individual problems. I now belong in that place. FML

    +5/-0   

    8:41 pm on September 17, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Woody Woobie 11:15 pm on September 17, 2014 | Reply

      There is a special place in hell for people who aren’t Woody Woo.

  • How quickly the summer scrim of optimism and goodwill is worn through. MLIFatigue

    +9/-0   

    5:49 pm on September 16, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttfucker 420 12:34 am on September 17, 2014 | Reply

      That’s too bad. I hope your partner is okay. Stay safe.

    • buttfucker 420 1:00 am on September 17, 2014 | Reply

      Yeah tell me about it. But we were all kind of missing this weren’t we?

    • L'Sleutteax 11:51 am on September 17, 2014 | Reply

      Just find someone to make love to! I find it invigorating. He might end up fatigued in another way though ;)

      • Anscombe 12:37 am on September 18, 2014 | Reply

        You mean emotionally fatigued due to the inability of college-aged men (and women for that matter) to handle the emotional demands of premarital sex? :(

    • b0ttf0ck3r 0x1a4 1:20 pm on September 17, 2014 | Reply

      y0y0 j0st f0ck b0tts 4nd sm0k3 w33d

    • buttfucker 420 6:29 pm on September 17, 2014 | Reply

      You mean to say that you ended the summer with goodwill and optimism? Please tell us what experiences gave you this feeling – did you make a difference? Did you discover beautiful truths?

      • OP 1:50 am on September 18, 2014 | Reply

        For your information, I spent the whole summer alphabetizing pieces of paper and then at the end they didn’t even bother to pay me. That’ll wear through optimism and goodwill fast. You’re an asshole.

  • I want buttfucker 420 to fuck me up the butt. MLIPFML

    +0/-3   

    11:59 pm on September 15, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Fun Fact 10:04 am on September 16, 2014 | Reply

      A calorie is the amount of time it takes to heat one liter of water one degree Celsius.

      • '14 9:17 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

        Really? Is this supposed to be incorrect?

        • Duh 11:49 am on September 17, 2014 | Reply

          My second-grade class taught me that facts are correct, while opinion is subjective. My eighth-grade geometry class taught me basic logic – with the premise that this is a fact, then it must be correct.

      • MAE '16 10:25 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

        It’s the amount of energy needed to raise one kg of water by one degree celsius. Incorrect facts are not fun.

        • anna 9:07 am on September 17, 2014 | Reply

          for you’re information, a calorie is the amount of time needed to raise my PENIS one degree celsius and 180 degrees vertically. Muah your an asshole.

          • nicely done 5:34 pm on September 17, 2014 | Reply

            +1

        • Anonymous 9:20 am on September 17, 2014 | Reply

          Thought it was 1gram – thinking of dietary or kilocalorie? Also, extrapolating 1liter to 1kg for pure water is adequate for most calculations.

    • buttfucker 420 4:18 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

      That’s too bad. I hope your partner is okay. Stay safe.

  • Was going to get laid, but then my partner got McCoshed. FML

    +1/-10   

    9:59 pm on September 15, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttfucker 420 11:04 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

      That’s too bad. I hope your partner is okay. Stay safe.

    • Oh and 4:10 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

      Is the only reason you were going to get laid because your partner was that trashed? FYSL

    • hm 8:54 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

      for future reference, if the person you’re thinking of hooking up with has a pretty reasonable chance of being taken to mccosh, you should probably not hook up with them. way too drunk.

      • Cuntlicker Jones police 11:02 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

        For your information, use a preexisting PFML character if/when you can work it into your reply or gtfo. You’re an asshole.

    • buttfucker 420 8:10 am on September 17, 2014 | Reply

      Yeah tell me about it. But we were all kind of missing this weren’t we?

  • I worry that my roommates might overhear me masturbating. FML, but then again MLIA

    +5/-1   

    10:23 am on September 15, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttfucker 420 11:24 am on September 15, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo just smoke weed with them and fuck dem up da butts they’ll be super chill yoyo

      • zero 6:44 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

        moderation on this website. zero.

        • buttfucker Phones 10:54 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

          yoyo omg just fuck off you stupid jealous loser your not cool enough to smoke weed and fuck butts with us muah your an asshole

        • lol 8:39 am on September 16, 2014 | Reply

          i hate the new mods. 10/10 some sophs from colonial who can do some coding.

    • just 8:10 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

      fucking do it no one gives a shit

    • -_- 11:29 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

      Are you me?

      • Probably not 2:08 am on September 18, 2014 | Reply

        It is impossible for two different people (in this case, you and the author of the post) to be the same person. There is however the possibility that you did indeed write the post, but then forgot all about it and were moved to ask this question upon rereading it. If you think you may be suffering from amnesia, you should consult a medical professional.

  • I hate the eating club dynamic. I hate how I have to be friends and simultaneously interact with a big group of people at all times when I’d much rather have one on one meals and conversation. I barely have any real friends there, only ”proximity” friends. It’s all so fake and reminds of high school. FMTerraceL

    +27/-5   

    6:01 pm on September 14, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttswagger 666 7:08 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      yeye maybe if you yolo in the buttswag you’d rid the devil from their anuses

      • Tell me 10:32 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

        Is your mother proud of you?

    • Co-op '15 8:05 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      You should join a co-op!

      • buttfucker 420 7:53 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

        yoyo mathey coop is the most weedchill all they do is fuk buts and smoke ganjayoloswag420weed

    • Terran '15 8:49 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      From talking to friends in other clubs, it seems as bad or worse in Terrace compared to most clubs. Everyone is in a clique of 5-10 people, and I feel like I hardly know anyone in the club.

      • '17 9:08 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

        Wait, are you serious? I thought Terrace was the choice of people who didn’t like the traditional eating club experience and wanted a more chill environment. Can you explain more?

        • future '14 12:34 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

          A trend I’ve noticed over the past few years is that a number of people make that choice with a group of close friends – not wanting to get split up by bicker, they settle on Terrace as a welcoming place they can all join.

          the issue rises when they’re only strongly interested in hanging out with those friends, and not as motivated to meet other people in the club. especially if they don’t come to a lot of member events, which occasionally are a little too out there for some people who joined to be with friends rather than for the particular culture, their time in the club is basically limited to meals, at which their group grabs their own table. it results in a few insular communities within the club, and that can be a little off-putting to someone who joined without a group. this seemed a bit more common in ’15 than ’14, and even more so with ’16.

          it’s still possible to show up and make friends, but it’s a little more difficult than it should be.

          • '17 2:57 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

            What is Terrace “culture” like? Does it necessarily involve drug use?

            Also, are Colonial and Tower good alternatives for someone who dislikes the traditional, frat-under-a-different-name experience?

            • srs? 7:24 pm on September 15, 2014

              eating clubs = frats-under-a-different-name.

            • future '14 7:30 pm on September 15, 2014

              1) not necessarily. it’s just pretty weird and out there sometimes. I’d say part of it is being a little comfortable with drug use even if you aren’t going to do it yourself, because it happens. some people who joined with their friends are weirded out by that, even though they probably knew to expect it. others don’t smoke or anything, but are cool about it being around – much better approach.

              to some degree it’s about events like Butts Butts Butts or Drag Ball, various members nights, and having serious musicians come play. for some people, those things are really cool and something they’ll get really excited about. they’re into getting pretty weird and pushing boundaries a bit. others aren’t, and might not make much of an effort to get involved.

              2) I can’t really say, as I only experienced being in one club. I’d say that each club is a pretty individualized experience – they each have their own culture. TI is not the same as Ivy is not the same as Cottage. Colonial and Tower also have their own identities. I’ve had friends in both who really liked it, and also known a couple people who weren’t as thrilled. it probably depends on how the club fits you, and whether you’re willing to enmesh yourself in the club. as a sophomore, you’re in a pretty excellent position to get some info – all these clubs will be having recruitment events, and both at those and on regular nights or conversation, their members will be more than happy to talk your ear off about their club. Find people who will give you honest assessments, which means mentioning the bad as well as the good.

              as “non-future ’14″ mentioned below, one thing I think bicker clubs do pretty well is get everyone to know each other. part of that is through bicker in the first place – everyone joining is in the same place, and have to meet a bunch of the members. then, from what I’ve heard from friends, some have some really good events that get people to hang out with different members. this isn’t to say terrace doesn’t have anything like this (there’s a night of speed-friending that actually introduced me to one of my best friends). still, it just seems like some bicker clubs are particularly good at getting their members interconnected.

        • non-future '14 2:25 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

          I can mostly speak to my own experience, but I joined a bicker club where I knew nearly nobody instead of signing into terrace with friends. Some elements may have been less “chill”, but those were also what helped me make new friends; there were a lot of activities that tried to mix people up. Of course, there were definitely people who just sat in the corner with their same few friends and didn’t want to meet others (and I never really understood why they joined a club at all), but with the combination of activities and effort I wound up with very close, real friendships.

          I get the one-on-one thing. For me, hanging around my club a lot – drinking tea, doing homework, etc. – was how I got to know people one-on-one instead of at big meals. And it takes effort, but if you’re open with people you transition from silly mealtime smalltalk to real conversations.

        • Terran '16 9:57 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

          Personally, I don’t see Terrace as being “cliquey,” I see it as being… sociologically normal, you could say. When I ate in dining halls, there were always groups of people who frequently sat with each other, and sometimes I would bounce around between them. And at Terrace it’s the same. You can’t expect everyone to know everyone else when there’s a couple hundred members. Breaking off into smaller groups is natural.

          But those groups don’t seem exclusive to me. It definitely feels easy to go up to people who I’ve only seen around and make new friends. And I have seen others do the same thing. And especially if you check out members nights and other events – those are great for meeting new people.

          As to the question about Terrace culture, it just seems free to me – people are free to be who they want. There isn’t any demand for conformity that I feel in other environments. And as for drugs, probably the majority of members aren’t involved with them, I would say. But because Terrace is so free and accepting, it’s natural that people who are would end up there. At Terrace you do you. And I know this sounds like some advertisement but it’s sincerely how I feel.

      • 15 9:28 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

        i feel the same way and also feel like terrace wasn’t like this when we joined :( i don’t get how to make real friends out of these shallow situations

        • but actually 7:49 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

          terrace WAS like this when we joined. the only difference is that we felt as though things might get better, or that maybe we weren’t having the ‘real’ terrace experience. but even some alumni @ reunions in june were saying that they thought terrace was going downhill when they left 5 years ago. sure, the club has grown — but people were complaining about these same issues before that.

          really, these issues are not specific to terrace. im sure students in the same bicker club as non-future ’14 have made almost the exact same complaints.

      • The Dilettante 5:48 am on September 15, 2014 | Reply

        I, too, had a pretty mediocre experience of Terrace and ended up hardly spending any time there as a consequence of the first few weeks’ shallow cliquemongering.

        But as everyone knows, I’m one of these lunatics who’s of the idea that we should just abolish the whole idiotic eating club system and turn the mansions into rentable public spaces for students or museums or something — or, failing that, burn the whole goddamn mess of them down when no one’s looking.

        • I 8:56 am on September 15, 2014 | Reply

          Love you

        • '17 11:56 am on September 15, 2014 | Reply

          Can you tell me what your experience was like? How large is the club as a whole, and how/when are the cliques formed? How large are they?

          • yo 4:09 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

            this is pfml, not an advice board. come to terrace for a meal sometime and ask us yourself

          • ^ exactly. 10:37 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

            pfml is going to be populated by people ranting. you can basically get a negative picture of anything on here. don’t rely on this as source for accurate information, find out for yourself

        • Terrace Fox 3:24 am on September 17, 2014 | Reply

          Curious. I spent my sophomore year avoiding the cliquemongering. It certainly slowed down my social development. I suppose the thing is just to accept that a lot of your social contact will be superficial, horrific as it is to live through. Also, that if you’re real with people, they’ll be real, back, too.

        • lorax 11:00 pm on September 17, 2014 | Reply

          (you know who I am) Turn them all into food co-ops is way better — people will still in fact need to eat

          • The Dilettante 2:58 pm on September 18, 2014 | Reply

            Can they be co-ops and museums at the same time? Because otherwise you lose the pleasure of being able to display the totems of the ruling class as ridiculous artifacts of a thankfully half-forgotten past.

            E.g. —

            “And this hideous, sticky-floored cellar used to be the taproom, where the orgies were held.”

            “What’s that big brown thing in the corner?”

            “That’s a keg. Think of it as an efficient device for the consumption of large amounts of alcohol in short periods of time. Like a bong, only for extremely shitty light beer called Beast.”

            “But why consume large amounts of shitty beer rather than comparatively smaller amounts of something which actually tasted good?”

            “The rituals of the ruling class, particularly at their early embryonic stages, remain somewhat mysterious since they were hardly ever written down. Perhaps it was merely conspicuous consumption — quantity looks better than quality? Or perhaps it was all part of some elaborate hazing ritual. Either way, we can be glad they all got guillotined.”

            • '16 10:16 am on September 19, 2014

              You’re sick. You need some kind of help.

            • wait 10:56 am on September 19, 2014

              1) do you actually think that kegs are brown?

              2) do you actually think that kegs are strongly associated with “the ruling class” more than the general population?

              3) do you actually not understand the economics of a large organization placing multi-keg orders of low quality beer?

            • not french 4:35 pm on September 20, 2014

              Oh sure, we celebrate Bastille Day, but we never think it’ll happen to us.

    • buttfucker 420 9:10 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo food = love

    • Putin 4:43 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

      Crimea river

    • quadrangler 6:01 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

      Yo! Try Quad! Seems everybody talks to everybody else and it’s hands-down the most welcoming group I’ve encountered at Princeton. And that’s coming from someone with positive experiences with the social life!

      • Anonymoose 11:08 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

        +33

        • inquadnito 10:03 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

          I’d chat that

    • Terrace Fox 3:21 am on September 17, 2014 | Reply

      If anything, that shouldn’t happen at Terrace of all places. I hate these same things. Let’s meet up and chat over dinner. Email me at coronacoreanici (splat google mail), please. You seem interesting.

  • Someone plz date me. FML

    +6/-1   

    6:00 pm on September 14, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Oooooh 6:19 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      I’ll date you so sweetly you’ll become diabetic.
      You’ll like it so much t’will be nearly pathetic.
      Muah. U A doll.

    • just 11:26 am on September 15, 2014 | Reply

      look at your ID or birth certificate and you’ll be accurately dated.

      • i'm 3:56 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

        amused lol

  • Rush in 4 days. FML

    +0/-7   

    11:37 am on September 14, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • I've always wondered 11:46 am on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      Why do people rush frats/sororities? There are already eating clubs, which are essentially the same thing, albeit requiring upperclassmen status. I honestly just don’t understand the appeal of Greek life. At my undergrad, it was basically buying your friends.

      • to get 5:02 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

        into eating clubs

        • But 9:30 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

          Aren’t eating clubs essentially frats? Is social life here really that toxic?

          • naive freshman 10:25 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

            is naive

    • buttfucker 420 1:10 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo omg if you odnt somke w33d and ufckkkkk butttsss likc me and my hot pi phi bestsisiiseiss you won’t get in muah your not a dol

    • douche 2:44 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      bag

  • Thought I was over her. Now she lives down the hall and I’m back to square one. FML

    +7/-0   

    11:36 am on September 14, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Buttfucker Jones 11:47 am on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo at least your PENIS isn’t back to square one now that you no longer get to fuck her up the BUTT.

      • Everybody else 9:39 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

        I’m getting so sick of this character.

    • F '17 12:28 am on September 16, 2014 | Reply

      why can’t you say something about it? clearing the air is always good. or is she/are you seeing someone else?

      • Eh 6:21 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

        From the way this was worded, I’d think he already said something, it didn’t go well, and he’s trying to move on. Please do tell, OP…

      • OP 11:44 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

        No, neither of us are seeing anyone, but she already told me she’s not interested. I’m not sure what “clearing the air” would accomplish at this point.

  • Clueless frosh re lawnparties. FMCL

    +4/-0   

    12:58 am on September 14, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttfucker 420 2:58 am on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo vulnerable, naive freshmen are the best. just get them high and then fuck dem up their tight anuses.

      • just 6:00 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

        no

    • what 3:02 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

      does the C stand for?

      • '16 8:11 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

        You’re pretty Clueless.

      • anon 10:17 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

        Closeted

  • Got fucked up the butt at Cloister and then went to Terrace and smoked a J. MLIbuttfucker420.

    +6/-6   

    11:24 am on September 13, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • buttfucker 420 11:39 am on September 13, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo omg for your information your a dol muah your also an asshole.

    • '15 12:21 pm on September 13, 2014 | Reply

      Goddaamit. I actually laughed.

    • Fun Fact 2:26 pm on September 13, 2014 | Reply

      You smoked a butt and Cloister and then fucked up a J at Terrace

    • The real buttfucker 420 9:12 pm on September 13, 2014 | Reply

      Yoyo you jest but actually this happened. At the end of spring quarter during dead week I literally went to every frat on the Ave. one of my TAs from quiz section got me stoned and then I went backed to the dorms and fucked an RA up the butt.

      • wtf 2:41 am on September 14, 2014 | Reply

        “every frat on the Ave” do you even go here?

        • Cuntlicker Hayward 10:05 am on September 15, 2014 | Reply

          For your information, yes my PENIS does go here to POUND THAT BOYPUSSY. You’re an asshole.

          • please 12:16 pm on September 15, 2014 | Reply

            Cuntlicker Hayward is lowhanging fruit. Try “The Cuntlittante” or something more creative.

            • The Dilettante 11:36 pm on September 16, 2014

              Even for a portmanteau, that’s a bloody hideous word. Honestly, you don’t exactly seem like one to be giving out lessons on wit — just saying.

            • please 2:47 pm on September 17, 2014

              and with that… I elicited the shortest ever response from The Dilettante. #boutiquetrolling

      • Billabong 8:09 am on September 14, 2014 | Reply

        Frats?! on the Ave?! RAs?!

        Wow, I really think you don’t go here!

      • and 1:04 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

        “quiz section”??

        • Oh and 4:00 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

          Quarters vs semesters? Fail troll

          • Troll? 9:12 pm on September 14, 2014 | Reply

            Fail? Someone just had a nice lunch.

        • not 6:27 pm on September 16, 2014 | Reply

          to mention “dead week”

      • i c u uchicago 1:12 am on September 15, 2014 | Reply

        i c wat u did dere

  • Does anyone use bored@firestone anymore… MLIA

    +0/-3   

    5:04 pm on September 12, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Buttfucker Jones 7:32 pm on September 12, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo at least your PENIS didn’t fall off while you were bored at firestone and trying to fuck the librarian up the butt.

    • buttfucker 420 7:42 pm on September 12, 2014 | Reply

      buttfuckin@weedstone yolswugg

  • Loud knocking from next door has been going on intermittently all day. Just started up again and startled me enough to ruin my orgasm. FMNeighbors

    +3/-1   

    3:34 pm on September 12, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Buttfucker Jones 3:55 pm on September 12, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo At least your PENIS didn’t fall off while your neighbors fantasized about fucking you up the butt.

      • Cuntlicker 420 9:55 pm on September 12, 2014 | Reply

        come up with your own character. 0/10

    • Oh 8:44 pm on September 12, 2014 | Reply

      My

  • It’s only the first day and I’m already so over school, planning not to read for certain classes and strategizing what lectures I can skip. I usually don’t get like this until mid-way through the semester. FML

    +11/-6   

    1:13 am on September 11, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • Buttfucker Jones 9:16 am on September 11, 2014 | Reply

      At least your PENIS didn’t fall off while your professors collectively fucked you up the butt.

    • Tired 10:01 am on September 11, 2014 | Reply

      Have you spoken to someone at McCosh? Seriously, you shouldn’t be sabotaging yourself. You may want to figure out why you are doing this.

      • 15 1:07 pm on September 11, 2014 | Reply

        yeah i too wish mccosh could treat my laziness

        • buttfucker 420 2:40 pm on September 12, 2014 | Reply

          yoyo brother you speak truth about laziness for reals . The only thing that gets me off the coach is Hoagie Haven. Sometimes I hit that shit 4 times a day. smoke w33d 4eva namaste

      • hmm 1:35 pm on September 11, 2014 | Reply

        Kind of seems like you’re sounding the alarms a bit too soon. This is a super normal way of getting through a semester – healthy, really, to be finding ways to avoid unnecesssary stress.

        • and yet 6:44 pm on September 11, 2014 | Reply

          still something for which it might be totally productive to talk to someone. not every trip to CPS has to be about severe depression – working on figuring out where your head’s out and making sure you can find the motivation to get through regular work is a great measure to take.

    • dude 1:11 pm on September 11, 2014 | Reply

      You never skip lectures and do all the readings until midway through? I bet 90% of us can’t say that.

      • Wait 7:35 pm on September 11, 2014 | Reply

        How did you even get in?

    • '15 3:47 pm on September 11, 2014 | Reply

      I’m not doing work until at least 3 days post lawn parties

    • F'18 5:06 pm on September 11, 2014 | Reply

      ?

  • I fucking love being an upperclassman. MLIG

    +11/-0   

    11:47 pm on September 10, 2014 | Post Comment  

     
    • '14 9:11 am on September 11, 2014 | Reply

      YES. It is SO much better

    • buttfucker 420 9:15 am on September 11, 2014 | Reply

      yoyo word bro. food = love.

      • The real buttfucker 420 2:24 pm on September 11, 2014 | Reply

        Yoyo nice try butt you forgot to say “mashed potatoes”. Smoke w33d 4eva namaste

        • buttfucker 420 6:10 pm on September 11, 2014 | Reply

          yoyo if u were da real butfucka 420 all ud endorse was smokin weed and fukin buts

      • wrong 2:26 pm on September 11, 2014 | Reply

        cap = love

        • cap '14 2:58 pm on September 12, 2014 | Reply

          no.

          • tfc tfc tfc '14 1:07 pm on September 18, 2014 | Reply

            hahahaha. <3

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